Soooooo, apparently I am still pretty sensitive/oddly emotional about my half marathon. I was limping around work yesterday and this lady I know was like, "Wow, you did a long walk this weekend and now you're limping?". I gave her a confused look and said, "Um, no. I ran a half marathon...and now I'm limping." To which she replied, "Oooh, is that a long ways?" : / "It's 13.1 miles...so yeah...I would say so," I say with an abnormal amount of 'tude. With a chuckle and a smile she says, "Oh my goodness, if I walked that far, I would be limping too." I quickly retorted with the volume of my voice increasing with each syllable, "Yeah, actually it is far and I didn't walk it, I ran it.....in 2 hours and 24 minutes......that's an eleven minute mile...so...." She begins to become aware that I am starting to raise my voice and yet she says, "Yeah, it would probably take me three hours to walk that." At that......I turn bright red and hobbled away as quickly as I could before I forgot the commandment to love thy neighbor...even when your neighbor doesn't understand your major accomplishment and refuses to listen when you try and tell them how awesome and important it is. : ) Bad Katie.
I don't have any children, but I feel like with the big things in life....the things that you work at, train for, strive for, grow, and love...it's similar to giving birth (let me preface the paragraph below with the following:.....First of all...I don't know nuthin' about birthin' no babies. I have never given birth or even been in the same room and/or hospital floor with anyone giving birth...however, I have seen quite a few very informative documentaries regarding the subject, which therefore, I feel, completely gives me the right to wax poetic about baby birthin'. Wink.)
Any mom out there can tell you that when it comes to their baby, there is no one in the world that is allowed to look at that baby and say anything other than the nicest of all niceties. There is no allowance for anyone to say something like, "Eh, she's cute, but her eyes are a little close together and she kinda reminds me of that red-headed weird neighbor boy from that movie The Burbs." Hell to the no!
Every mother on Earth is so deeply proud of this little creation they have labored and birthed. This little baby is a part of them. These mothers have fed, grown, and cared for this little one even before it was big enough for them to see on an ultrasound or feel kicking and fluttering in their tummies. These mothers spent endless nights unable to sleep, uncomfortable, sick in the mornings (sick in the middle of the day and at night too). These mothers would try and picture what their little bundle of love and joy would look like, sound like, be like. These mothers would have days when they loved being pregnant. Loved the feeling of having this new life growing inside them every day. And other days, they almost couldn't stand waiting to meet their little one. (AKA...get this baby outta me.) They would worry about the health of the baby. They would worry that something would go wrong. And when the day finally came for the baby to be welcomed into the world...that's right...labor pain. Sarcastic YAY! These mothers had to push and fight in order to bring this new creation into existence. They had to keep going even when it was painful and they had no energy left. They had to forget about what they looked like or what people thought. They had to forget about being embarrassed or keeping it together. No one else mattered but the baby. These mothers knew that if they kept going...even though it was unimaginably painful for a brief time (when you look at your entire life that is...I'm sure it seems far from brief as your going through it) that they would be blessed with something that would forever change them and change the way they understood life, and family, and God, and everything. Most mothers would tell you that they barely remember all of the pain...and even if they do...they consider it all worth it in order to hold their little one in their arms.
But wait...there's more....you don't have to give birth to a baby in order to have the experience of birthing out a new creation in your life. Lots of women never experience giving birth...for many reasons. And of course men don't get to experience this in the same capacity....obviously. But God loves us all so much that He gives each one of us the opportunity to bring new life and new creations into this world no matter where we are from, whether we are a man or a woman, no matter our age, or race, or income level. Will we allow God to birth something out in us? Will we allow God to grow and birth out the purpose and promise He planted in us? The decision is ours.
Running the marathon is kinda like my new "baby". I think that is why I am so sensitive about it right now. I fully expect everyone to hear about my "baby" and go on and on about how amazing and wonderful it is and how they can't believe I did it. I know that other people were around and other people heard me talk about it, or read what I was saying about it...but no one can really understand how amazing it was to me personally...except me and God. I have had other "babies" I've labored painfully over in my life, believe me....but this one is unique...they are all unique. Just like parents all love their children the same, but just in different ways...that is how I feel about the seasons that God takes me through. Although I love all of these growing experiences the same....each one offers me a new and different opportunity to learn and grow. Some things in life come easier to some rather than others. For example, it's really not a big deal for me to get up in front of people and talk...in fact, I totally love it...the more the merrier.....but, for some people that is like a fate worse than death. So for that person, being able to finally stand up in front of people and speak with ease and style...that...is HUGE! Well, to me...running 13 miles wasn't something I was necessarily "scared" of doing...it was just something that I had never even remotely considered doing. It wasn't until I actually considered doing it did I become scared. : ) I thought it was basically impossible for me. But now that God has gotten a hold of me (I'm talkin' kung fu ninja grip here people)....He has taken all of the limits off of my life. I used to be afraid of heights...not anymore! I used to hate spiders....not anymore! I used to think I would never be able to live in DC....HERE I AM! And you know what...this is just the beginning. This is just some surface scratching.